the bitch
Monday, October 09, 2006
Dear, the only way that i could comfort myself to not think of the thing happened to me recently is that, i need to admit myself is a bitch!
in chinese, so call "jian ren". yes, i am. I told my sister yesterday, i think myself is really a bitch. She said, "is good for u to think that way, cos a bitch would never admit themselves a bitch." Seriously i know she is right, but i am those kind who could not stop blaming myself, so i rather blamed everything on me then claiming others faulty. I know this is stupid, but what can i do? I feel better thinking this way, i got my release, i am a bitch.
I have been to granny house on the mooncake festival, and i told my cousins about the event, they just asked me to ignore them, they tried to comfort me, i know, thanks ya. The next day i went to a dental surgery, argh my mouth was bleeding and bleeding during the surgery..this is ....horrible.....
You know what, i hate myself to be too straightforward and naive. i hate myself in this sense. You all ask me not to change, but i could not help digging my own dark past.....